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By Alyssa, January 3, 2011 9:23 pm

It started after what I will now refer to as “The Mighty Flood of 2010.”  Feeling pretty miserable about how I would provide meals for my family without a kitchen table, I sent a help email out to a few of my friends.  Help, it said.  I asked our close friends for an invitation to their house for dinner, we’d bring the food, just give us a table to eat it on.  It was hard for me to ask for help but I knew looking at my toddlers and kitchen sub-flooring, I couldn’t do it on my own.

The first family to almost immediately respond was a couple from our Bible study small group.  We knew them pretty well, but not that well I’ll admit, and were kinda surprised at how quickly they jumped up to help us.  We took them up on an offer to do dinner at their house that Monday night.  Don’t bring anything, they said, just come and eat.  Midway through a great meal that Monday, they asked us what we were doing for dinner the next Monday night.  Looking at each other over their kitchen table, we said, ummmm, eating here?  With each dinner, we learned more and more about them.  We had both been Army families, but found even more in common than our prior occupations.

We had a few other families invite us over, but it was our Monday night family that wouldn’t let us off the hook.  We know you guys are in a bind, they would say, so stop apologizing for coming over and just come over.  From the end of September to the end of November we spent almost every Monday night at their house.  Our boys played with their little 3-year-old princess and we ate together through extended kitchen renovations.  We couldn’t wait until that first Monday night came when WE could actually host.  When the kitchen was 90% complete, they were the first to come over for a meal.  They oooohed and aaaahed over our new cabinets and didn’t care about the lack of a complete countertops or missing doors here and there.

As each piece of the kitchen came in, they were the first to see it.  We had them over to our house every week through the holidays.  At dinner tonight, we were finally able to show off the last of the kitchen repairs (you’ll see it in a post soon, don’t worry).  We treated them to Philly Cheesesteaks and fries, homemade of course, and watched our kiddos build couch forts.  I told them again how fortunate we were to have them as friends.

Now that the Mighty Flood is almost completely behind us, I have to admit how glad I am it happened.  If we weren’t without a kitchen for months at a time, maybe we wouldn’t have started our Monday night tradition. We wouldn’t have realized this amazing friendship just waiting for us.  I guess what I’m trying to say is how thankful I am that when handed utter chaos, we were also treated to a friendship for life.  Thanks R Family and happy Monday night!

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By Alyssa, December 29, 2009 10:58 pm

Since leaving high school, I’ve moved every three to four years.  I started in Spokane, added a couple months in Idaho, a few years in El Paso, Texas then Colorado Springs, and finally, settled into my current home, Denver.  I’ve managed to make military friends in every place I’ve lived.  Good friends, no, awesome friends. Friends that entertained my 9-month old when I was too sick to stand up and friends that brought Hubby meals when I deployed.

I thank the Army for giving me the skills to make great friends fast.  I’ll admit, I was pretty bad at the whole girlfriend thing in high school (most of my friends were guys) and only got a little better in college.  In the Army, however, I found that I couldn’t be picky or apprehensive.  Friends were family, sometimes for only a few months before moving to another Army post.  I think my military girlfriends became like my sisters when I found myself so far from relatives.

I’ve quickly made a community of girlfriends in Denver this last year.  This time I’m not moving nor do I sense the temporary as none of my current friends are in the military.  I’ve never lived by my friends for more than three years and, honestly, I’m kinda hoping I don’t screw things up.  I mean, seriously, it was nice not worrying about my aggressive, errr, outgoing personality driving someone crazy with an Army move on the horizon.  Who knows how long these new friends will be willing to listen to my babble (poor, poor Hubby).

I told Hubby about my worries and he tried really hard to be sympathetic.  It’s different with guys.  As long as Hubby’s friends enjoy beer and some sort of man-game (poker and pool come to mind), then he’s content. After more than ten years around dudes, women tend to scare my camo pants right off.  I don’t like to shop and my sense of humor can be… well, not so lady-like.  I have flaky tendencies and don’t understand over-sensitivity.  The crazy thing is all of my new girlfriends seem to be O.K. with that.

Never thought getting out of the Army would lead me to learning how to be a better girlfriend, but here I am.  All of my new girlfriends are moms and I’m hoping our common efforts will be like that military bond I had with my Army friends.  Really, I’m just hoping this post doesn’t scared off the few friends that I’ve made so far.  So, for my friends, old and new, thanks for giving this Army girl a chance.  Girlfriends can be scary, but, I think they’re worth it.